Category media

Participation in This Multi-Billion-Dollar Marketing Orgy is Mandatory

A friend on social media posed the question: What are your pop cultural red flags? and among the many replies was one—well, I’m quoting it, which is probably immoral, but I’m anonymizing the whole thing, because I’m not so very bad: “…I’m going to say ‘men who dislike The Last Jedi.’ Like, I’m sure that […]

Bowery at Midnight

Can we talk about something serious here for a moment? Can we talk about cult movies? Somehow I’ve lived an entire life—almost two lives, if you’re Keats—and no one’s told me about Bowery at Midnight. It’s in the public domain, like all good things, and you can just watch it for free if you wish. […]

Better Off Dead

Even after watching it fifty or sixty times, I’m not sure if Better Off Dead is a bad movie, or a good movie making fun of bad movies. Regardless, it’s a funny movie, and when a comedy is funny you can forgive the visual cliches, the montages, and the ski race. What I can’t forgive, […]

Oscars and the Grouch

Someone told me the Oscars are coming up, so I thought I’d look back at what kind of job the Academy has been doing. Here, therefore, is a list of Who Should Have Won Every Academy Award for Best Picture Going Back to 1930—based solely on the nominees. A * indicates the Academy correctly picked the best nominee, […]

The Truth Is Out There

The National Enquirer did fake news before it was cool. It’s also a fascinating glimpse into a parallel universe where people have opinions I disagree with. Look at this cover. What’s amazing about it—not the top parts, the bottom part—is that it makes a bunch of claims that are not very controversial. I mean, who doesn’t want […]

More Fun

We all know that some demographics try to press that everything is about race, and some demographics try to press that nothing is; I am, like my namesake, a trimmer, and I take no sides in this debate. But I want to bring up one area where everyone seems to think it is about race, […]

Sitcom Idea

Apparently this is a true fact from history: that disgraced, crooked, philandering televangelist (to be fair, in the ’80s it was the custom among televangelists to be philandering, crooked, and then briefly disgraced) and former puppeteer Jim Bakker, during his 45-year fraud sentence, shared a cell with 1. national skydiving champion and occasional international drug […]

Stand by Me and Our Modern Goals

Everyone knows what Stand by Me is about. Gordie “Wil Wheaton” Lechance and his three friends buck parental authority and leave civilization behind to go on a quest and play with guns. Along the way, Gordie experiences transcendence, learns the lessons of life and death, and “becomes a man” — or, more precisely, he becomes fully human. The experience […]

The Partridge Family Prophecy

From from the third-century Roman text of Aelian’s Historia Animalorum (A.F. Scholfield translation): Partridges while still in the egg and confined by the shell that has formed around them do not wait for their parents to hatch them out, but alone and unaided, like house-breakers, peck through the eggs, peep out, and then lever themselves up, […]