The search for truth is the only valid form of revenge. •pseudo-Nietzsche, My Sister and I (1951). There’s so much freedom in the world that you can pick anything you want and put it in your butt. •Björk, interview in Details 7/94. As long as a word remaineth unspoken it is in the prison of […]

Sometimes a plausible-sounding phrase grips the nation, and manages to persuade people, even though a moment’s rumination reveals it to be pure nonsense. When I was young, for example, people who didn’t want to wear seatbelts would always say, “I’d rather be thrown clear of the accident.” Of course this made no sense. That’s not […]

Q. What makes you say “Polly wanna cracker” when you’re speaking in tongues? (The answer is below, after all this filler text I put in for obscurity.) . FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER […]

Life with/against the Circus I joined the circus sort of, Ran away and joined the day we Tamed, beneath the overpass, menageries of sarin gas, The bearded lady, the leopards, and the kiwi. That morning, some drunk ape took my ticket. I said I should be comped because I Helped at the concession stand. He […]

Yes, that’s a depowered Wonder Woman helping Supergirl out by invoking what may not be the oldest name of God…but is certainly the most retro.

I came up with a lot of theories when I was a kid, and some of the were wrong, especially the ones about math. But some of them were pretty close to the mark. For example, I’d noticed that teachers often emphasized the importance of effort, saying something like: “It’s not your fault if you’re just […]

I. I grew up thinking that Lenny Bruce was a hero, because he suffered and died to expand the range of things we, as grownups, were permitted to talk about. The Victorian era was a dark, superstitious time when words such as”belly” or “leg” were considered injurious to “sensitive” souls, and therefore banned from polite […]